I got home from work and started making dinner while Helena watched Wow Wow Wubbzy (the current fave). I was very excited about dinner...one of my new favorite recipes from The Pioneer Woman -- Chicken Fried Steak with Gravy. Yummy yummy gravy.
Anyway, things are going well...and I go to pour the grease from the pan into a measuring cup over the sink to start making the gravy. A small bit splashes onto my finger and my reflexes kick in and I drop the entire pan of searing hot grease all over my hand.
As one can imagine, what immediately ensues next is a combination of screaming, cussing and crying. I immediately run my hand under cold water while attempting to stay relatively calm. Which I did a bad job of doing. Helena's wondering what the hell is going on. Ash is still at work and I figure I need to go to the ER most likely. The pain is pretty bad and not getting better. So, I call Ash's cell phone. First try, no answer. So I dial again...seriously...he answers to me bawling that I burnt my hand and that he needs to get home STAT. Poor guy, I about gave him a heart attack. I hate it when you receive or have to make phone calls like that.
So, I'm still crying and freaking out and I have my hand in a bowl of cold water now waiting for Ash to get home. Helena comes up and asks me what's wrong. I tell her I hurt my hand really bad. She says "Can I have dinner now mommy?". OK....I manage to get her set up with the potatoes and chicken fried steak sans gravy that was cooked. She eats, keeps watching TV, completely unsympathetic to what is going on. At one point she tells me, "Mom, my teachers say you shouldn't cry." Sure. Right. Eat your dinner, kid.
Ash gets home and we get everyone and everything together to go to the ER. We get there, I walk up to the check in and the nurse is all "Labor & Delivery? You can go upstairs." I'm like..."Well...no...I'm here for my burnt hand. See?? Thanks." I'm going to try my best not to have the baby in the middle of all this.
Anyway, we are at the hospital for about 45 minutes before I see a doctor and they tell me that since my hand and fingers are burned that they will treat me here but that I need to go to the Burn Center at the University of Utah the next day to make sure I will still be able to use my hand, etc. if I end up having major scarring. And, they'll peel off my dead skin and blisters while I'm there. Great. Completely freaked out now. They wrap up my hand with super duper expensive burn cream and gauze and now it hurts worse than it did before. Here's me very excited about the situation, and obviously looking my very 9 months pregnant best:
So, we go home, the pain meds finally kick in, thank god, and I go to sleep wielding my giant golf club, q-tip hand.
Yesterday we head up to the burn center at the University and while we're checking in Ash tells the lady that I hurt my hand making him a "hand sandwich". Great. Keep 'em coming, Ash. She thinks this is mildly funny. We get up to see the doctor and good news...after taking the bandages off, my hands do not have any super duper bad blisters or skin peeling! My hand is not nearly as bad as they thought it might be the night before. Relieved, we leave the hospital with no gauze on my hand and no follow up appointments to make. Today, I'm doing well and my hand hardly hurts at all. I can't believe how painful it was when I did it and how little it hurts today. Either I'm a giant wuss (possible) or I have super skin!
Ash tells me in the car on the way home after the 2nd doctor visit..."You know, honey, when you make me country fried steak, you don't actually have to fry your hillbilly hand as part of the recipe". Good, I'm glad you're joking. Let's just all be glad that I don't have a scary, scarred claw hand after all of this. I have a feeling taking care of a newborn would be a challenge if I only have one hand to use.
Moral of the story: fried foods are really bad for you and if you do spill grease on yourself, put your injured part in cold (not iced) water for inordinate amounts of time and things will turn out better than expected. The doctors all said I did a really good job of this. Oh, and we need to work on Helena's empathy skills.
-Emily :)
6 comments:
lmao you poor thing...had to read that one out loud to my training class...helena's teacher advice was just too good not to lol!
By FAR the funniest thing I have read in months! I am terribly sorry that it happened to you, of course, but at least you brought delight to south central Kansas with your misery.
As far as Helena goes, I think it was Wow Wow Wubzy's fault. If she'd been watching Little Bill, she would have called Ashford for you AND brought you cookies and a pillow. :)
Seriously, Emily, I'm so sorry about your hand, but that was so funny. The Ash and Helena quotes had me laughing out loud! Glad your hand is feeling so much better!
you poor girl. because being 9 months pregnant isn't painful enough
holy cow, that sucks! I'm a wuss when it comes to burn pain--it always lasts forever. When dad was in HS he worked at KFC and somebody ran into him while he was carrying the super hot chicken grease out to dump it and it spilled all over his arm--from shoulder to forearm.
Oh no! That's terrible. My cousin works in the burn center. Glad to hear it is healing ok.
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