Dramatic title, huh? Since next week will mark the first time we've been away for Helena for an extended period of time, I decided it was probably a good idea to get our end of life affairs in order. We found a great, free, online tool to use until we actually have an estate to help us organize all of the documents (Thanks Suze Orman!) and I'm almost finished up with everything. Now if 'Aimee the Notary' were here, it would be perfect. Ha!
I decided to clearly lay out my preferences for funeral arrangements, etc. to avoid familial conflicts and wrote this letter to communicate them. It became somewhat emotional for me to write it and I was surprised by my lack of a real opinion on certain things. For instance, I'm kind of on the fence about burial or cremation. But hey! I can always change my mind. Anyway, I thought I'd share excerpts of it here because A.) it's a good idea to have one (you'd be surprised at how many people don't) and B.) I tried to be funny, you know, because in the event of my untimely death it might be nice to remind people of my sense of humor.
Here's to not dying on vacation!!
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Memorial Service: I’d like a memorial service to be held outside somewhere (possibly graveside or at a park) or at a funeral home. Some music would be nice (I’ve always liked Amazing Grace and the Rock Chalk Chant) and a short message by the funeral home director about how great I was. Please no preaching at my funeral. If Ashford or the executor feels a viewing would be nice, then I am not against that. Please dress me in something you knew I liked a lot and that I looked good in. I’d also like mementos and pictures of my family in my casket if possible. Please feed people after the service, if possible, and make sure there are plenty of mystery salads to go around. And pie. I like pie a lot. I’ve always thought it was nice to have this luncheon so people can commiserate and comfort each other in a more informal atmosphere. Also, for the record, I’m not OK with everyone getting drunk before, at, or after my funeral. Save it for the next day.
Funeral Home Preference: At the discretion of Ashford or executor. Please do not spend a lot of money on my casket.
Other specific requests: I’d like a small, tasteful headstone (that’s not pink and does not have any engravings of angels or hearts on it) and for someone to plant flowers on top of my grave from head to toe so no one can step on me. Please visit me every once in awhile, but do not feel obligated to put fake flowers, flags or signage of any kind on my grave. Actually don’t ever put fake flowers on my grave, please. I hate those things.
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Let me know if I've forgotten something.
-Emily :)
2 comments:
Glad to know you still want to be covered with flowers, b/c I would have planted them myself if nobody else did. I've often thought of writing personal letters to my loved ones so I could speak to them from the grave and get the last word in. :)
You might as well write your obituary too. Mom dreamt hers and made me type it on my laptop on a drive to KC last year. We cried from McPhearson to Emporia - not a good idea while driving and I'm sure Henry was scared to death that we were crying our eyes out. It was pretty morbid and quite funny - not that I'm looking forward to her death or anything. Apparently, now that I've read it she also wants me to read it at the memorial. Here's to a long life so I don't have to. :)
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